(A knock at the door)
A: Who is it?
(The door slams open)
God: It is I! The Lord your God!
A: Oh, jeez. Did you invite him?
B: No. And today isn’t the sabbath.
A: Then what is he doing here?
God: Silence! You displease me!
A: Uh, oh. I think it’s judgement day.
B: Damn. And I forgot to atone for my sins.
A: Me too.
A+B: Yes, Lord!
A: Did we sign up for this?
B: You’re the one who picked one of the vengeful religions! We could have signed up for Buddhism!
A: Must you always blame everything on me?
God: Silence! Today is Judgement Day! You two shall stand trial!
A+B: For what Lord!
God: For the sins of your kind!
A: Oh, damn. We’re boned.
B: To say nothing of deafened. Oh Lord! Can we please have a lawyer!
God: I am merciful!
(A thunderclap. Jesus appears.)
A: Uh, I was hoping for someone from the Old testament.
B: Someone who had a real kingdom, maybe?
A: Like wise King Solomon?